Imperfect
by Twerksie
Summary: [one-shot] James Potter admits he's not perfect. [First of three parts in a series]


**Hey...'tis Kimmy here. With another short one shot to let you know I'm still alive and well and still writing. I made this as the first part in a series of three...I've got two done now. But I dunno if I'm gonna be able to finish the last one.   
Anyway, this story is called Imperfect. Another crappy title from me, I know, but I felt it really...er...something. Sorry, I'm distracted. Hehe. Anyway, here 'tis! Hope you like and I hope you review, cuz as you know...I love reviews! _Yours truly, Kimmy._**

Imperfect By Kimmy 

Summary: James Potter admits he's not perfect. one-shot 

The fire cast an eerie glow on the occupants of the common room. It was a Saturday. Another lonely, cold and distant Saturday for James Potter. He sat, buried deep in his thoughts, as the other Gryffindors laughed and joked and enjoyed their break from work. 

He would have gladly spent this Saturday with his friends-anybody to keep him company, really-but they were all out with their dates. Hell, even Little Peter had a date, much to everyone's surprise. Well, everyone's...except James. Everything else had gone wrong, he reasoned, he couldn't expect this to be any different, could he? 

Now there he was, staring into the fire blankly while he rested in his armchair. He was thinking about nothing in particular, letting his mind wander freely and letting time pass by without a thought. He reflected on Lily for quite a while, wondering why she hated him so...which led then to contemplating...himself. 

What was there for Lily to hate? He had great hair that would make anyone swoon, his eyes were often described as painfully sexy, his grin made females melt, he was physically fit, and his arse didn't look so bad either. Really, why did Lily hate him? He was perfect! 

James pretended he didn't hear the voice in his head that told him otherwise. 

If Lily gave him a chance, he'd treat her like gold. Or better than gold, if that was possible. He'd worship the ground she walked on, everything she touched. He'd give her flowers every single day, he'd buy her anything she wanted without question. He'd give her diamonds and chocolate and perfume-anything to make her happy. He'd give her the world...if only she would give him a chance. Was that so much to ask for? One day. One day to show her what she means to him. 

Why does she hate him? He was everything any other girl would wish for! He was their Prince Charming! But not to Lily. Lily saw something different whenever she looked at him. But what did she see? Surely, James argued, I'm everything she wants. 

Once again, he tried to block out the words that were swimming about in his head. 

He knew she saw him out of the corner of her eye. She was only ten feet away, how couldn't she? But the real question was why she wasn't doing anything about it. Doesn't she care even a little? James closed his eyes, trying not to think about it, but the answer was too clear to miss. No. She doesn't care. Not one bloody bit. Instantly, a wave of fury threatened to overcome him. Why didn't she care? James Potter was a human being as well! His eyes snapped open, revealing the hazel eyes that were now housing its own flame. 

But he caught his breath...and hid his eyes behind his lashes again. This was not Lily's fault, he reasoned. It was his. He brought a hand to his forehead, sighing. He was disgusted with himself for blaming her. Of course she didn't care. Why would she care about him? 

And for the first time in many, many years, James Potter admitted something to himself that he had kept hidden. It was the simplest of things, really. And he realized then, that it was also very stupid. Lily had known it. Everyone else had known it. And James had known it, too. But he never acknowledged it. James Potter was not perfect. 

He knew he wasn't great. He knew he didn't have the perfect hair. He knew...and it was painful. And for years, he had blamed every single thing that had went wrong on others, when he knew, deep inside, that he was to blame. His pride, his arrogance, kept him from admitting defeat. But in the end...those same things that had kept him from defeat...had become his defeat. 

There, he thought furiously, is that what you want, Lily? Did you want me to bare my heart and soul to you? Was this really why he was sitting there alone? Was this the true reason why she hated him? 

What was he supposed to do now? 

**Now watch out for the next part, called Flawed (How lame, eh?)...but this time it's from Lily's POV. Anyway, review, and review, and review! It makes me ridiculously happy! -Kimmy. **


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